45 Funny Reasons to Miss Work People Have Really Used

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We can’t promise they'll work, but they’ll definitely make you laugh
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Sometimes, life happens in weird, whacky ways that prevent you from making it into work. But will your boss really believe you when you tell them that there’s a squirrel loose in your house or that your dentures flew out the car window on the highway? Well, we’re not sure, but it’s worth a try! We scoured the internet to find the funniest, zaniest, most unbelievable excuses people have actually used (or tried to use) to get out of work. We don’t know if they got away with it, but maybe they’ll make your reason for needing a day off seem mundane in comparison.

Our Favorite Funny Excuses for Missing Work

  • You accidentally ate a can of cat food, thinking it was tuna.
  • Your dog locked your son out of the house.
  • Your mother called to say your car is low on gas.
  • You have a casserole in the oven.
  • You set your uniform on fire trying to dry it quickly in the microwave.
1

Good Weather

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  1. One employee called in to say they couldn’t come into work because the weather was way too beautiful to be stuck inside. We’re sure office employees and indoor workers can relate to this one!
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2

A Spicy Pepper

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  1. Cooking spicy food is fun…until you accidentally rub your eye! One employee called out of work because they were preparing a spicy Jamaican marinade that required chopping up some habanero peppers. One thoughtless rub of the eye (and some burning tears) later, they couldn’t see well enough to drive. Ouch.
3

I Thought It Was Tuna

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  1. Think twice before opening a can of tuna for lunch. One employee said they couldn’t make it to work because they accidentally ate a can of cat food instead and became “deathly ill.” We guess the cat’s out of the…can?
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4

What Day Is It?

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  1. One employee let their boss know they were going to be late because they woke up, thought it was Saturday, and went back to bed for 3 more hours. Mornings are hard!
5

Attack of the Scooter

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  1. We all remember getting our ankles banged up by walking around with our Razor scooters, right? Well, one employee had to miss work because they got their leg run over when a teenage scooter speed demon didn’t see them on the sidewalk. Ouch!
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6

Got It!

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  1. Broken bones are no joke, but this excuse sounds like one. An employee had to miss work because they broke their arm reaching to grab a falling sandwich! Maybe lunch is the most important meal of the day after all?
    EXPERT TIP
    Mark Fennell

    Mark Fennell

    Life & Business Coach
    Mark Fennell is a mindset and performance coach based in Ireland. With over 20 years of experience, Mark is renowned for helping individuals and business owners unlock clarity and achieve long-term success. His work combines evidence-based high-performance coaching with strategy and clarity, helping clients turn pressure into purpose and achieve sustained results. Mark is the bestselling author of the book Break Through and is a regular contributor on TV, radio, and many podcasts and media outlets. He has worked with over 250 organizations, including BBC, Newstalk, PwC, Virgin Media, and more. He has also coached over 1,000 one-to-ones and has over half a million followers on social media. As a member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF) and a QQI-qualified professional, Mark has earned a reputation as one of Ireland’s most trusted leading coaches.
    Mark Fennell
    Mark Fennell
    Life & Business Coach

    Communicate clearly and keep it short when you’re calling out. Let your boss know a brief why. Don't feel you have to elaborate and remember, they're your boss, not your partner. You're accountable to them on a professional level, but you're not accountable to them on all levels. Be professional.

7

Don’t Tempt Fate

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  1. One employee said they couldn’t come into work because they had just seen a fortune-teller who warned them not to leave the house, or else they would risk a brain hemorrhage. Seems fair to us!
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8

No Parking

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  1. One employee simply “couldn’t” work because the parking lot at their office was full. We guess that means there were enough people there to cover for them? Commuting is no joke!
9

Garbage Sets Sail

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  1. When a storm strikes and your street is flooded, you certainly can’t drive to work! If your boss doesn’t believe you, just send them a video of your garbage can floating away down the block like one employee had to do to get the day off.
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10

A Bad Reflection

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  1. Our relationship with ourselves is important to our overall well-being. One employee called in to say they weren’t coming to work because their reflection in the morning looked “judgy” and they needed a mental health day to “repair their relationship with the mirror.” It takes guts to admit that.
    EXPERT TIP
    Brandy DeOrnellas, PCC, ESQ.

    Brandy DeOrnellas, PCC, ESQ.

    Career & Life Transition Coach
    Brandy DeOrnellas is a Professional Certified Coach specializing in life and career aspirations and transitions. She also serves company founders and small business owners. She is a former attorney with more than three years of experience as a coach. Brandy holds a JD from Harvard Law School. She also holds a BA in Social Welfare and a BA in Political Science from The University of California, Berkeley. In addition to her formal education, she has multiple coaching certifications, including a Professional Coaching Certification from The University of California, Davis, and a Relationship Coach Certification from Prepare/Enrich. She is a Professional Certified Coach (PCC) with the International Coaching Federation.
    Brandy DeOrnellas, PCC, ESQ.
    Brandy DeOrnellas, PCC, ESQ.
    Career & Life Transition Coach

    We all need mental health days. Make it clear that your day off is a necessity, not a request. If you don’t feel comfortable providing details, you can say something as simple as: “I won’t be able to come into the office today as I need to take a day for my health. I’ll see you on Tuesday morning.”

11

Dog vs. Son

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  1. Dog is man’s best friend…until your dog locks your son out of the house and you have to miss work to let him back in, as one employee had to do.
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12

The Nose Knows

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  1. You never know what your kid will get up to, or what they’ll get up their nose. One employee had to leave work immediately because their child put a pea in their nostril and couldn’t get it out. (At least they were eating their vegetables!)
13

Winning Big

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  1. One employee got an urgent call from their wife saying they needed to come home immediately. Rightfully concerned, they left right away, only to discover their wife was on the radio trying to win $500 for convincing her husband to leave work. Cha-ching?
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14

Pesky Parrot

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  1. One employee had to leave work in a hurry to rescue their wife from their pet parrot, who had escaped from its cage. She had locked herself in the bedroom in defense, not because the parrot was dangerous or mean, but because she was scared of it.
15

Boarding Pass, Please

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  1. One employee had to tell their boss they couldn’t come in because they had accidentally gotten on a plane. Were they traveling? We’re not sure. Why were they at the airport? We don’t know. How did they manage to board without a boarding pass? Some things are just meant to remain a mystery.
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16

Pranked!

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  1. One employee had to miss work because somebody had glued their doors and windows shut. We just want to know what kind of industrial glue this prankster had access to (and where we can get some).
17

Denture Demise

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  1. Driving is risky, especially when you have dentures. One employee called in to say they weren’t making it into the office because their false teeth flew out the window while they were driving down the highway!
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18

Cat in Crisis

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  1. Our pets’ health is important! One employee said they weren’t coming into work today because their cat was having an existential crisis and wouldn’t stop meowing. Honestly, same.
19

Save the Fish

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  1. An employee once looked their manager in the eye and said they had to leave work because their goldfish was drowning and walked away before their boss could process the statement. Confidence can sell anything!
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20

Summer Nativity

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  1. On one beautiful summer day, an employee (who did not have kids) said they had to leave work early to attend “the little one’s nativity play.” When their boss tried to argue, the employee pointed out that they had used this excuse in the winter and it was only fair that they get to use it, too.
21

O-No-Zone

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  1. The hole in the ozone layer is no laughing matter. One employee claimed they couldn’t come to work because the ozone in the air flattened all of their tires. The climate crisis strikes again!
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22

A Good Gamble

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  1. When you’re on a lucky streak, you just can’t stop. One employee said they couldn’t come into work because they had been gambling all weekend at the casino and still had money left to bet on Monday morning. May the odds be ever in your favor!
23

Mother Knows Best

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  1. One employee in their mid-30s claimed they had to leave work early because their mother told them their car was low on gas. Every mother-child relationship is different, we guess.
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24

A Midwest Delicacy

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  1. Midwesterners are known for their delicious casseroles and hot dishes. One employee abruptly left work, saying only, “I have a casserole in the oven.” We’re definitely going to have to try this one.
25

Wrong Bottle

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  1. It’s a good idea to keep some cold medicine in your office in case you get a sniffle at work. One employee accidentally took a big swig of Tylenol PM (the kind that makes you sleepy) during the work day, and had to leave immediately to drive home before they were knocked out at their desk.
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26

Getting Squirrely

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  1. One employee had to leave a Zoom meeting early and stop work for the day. The reason? A squirrel had fallen down their chimney and was running around the house like a maniac.
27

RIP to My Friend’s Dog

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  1. The loss of a pet is a devastating event. One employee said they couldn’t come into work because their friend’s dog had passed. They hadn’t seen the friend in years because they emigrated, and they had never met the dog. Still, they needed time to process!
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28

Our Hearts Beat as One

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  1. Sometimes, you have to be resourceful and take cues from your environment to find a reason to leave work. One boss had been talking about how their father needed an angioplasty after complaining about chest pain. Later that day, an employee said they needed to leave early because they were having chest pains and needed an angioplasty. Coincidence? We guess…
29

Survival of the Fittest

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  1. One employee got lost in the woods over the weekend and didn’t go to work because they never made it home until 4AM Monday morning. Sure, they were only 3 miles from home and sure, it was a pretty developed area with clearly marked roads. But sometimes, you just have to commune with nature.
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30

Whoa, Man

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  1. We’re not one to judge when it comes to enjoying some…illicit activities in your down time. One employee called their boss to say, with admirable honesty, “I’m pretty high right now. I’m kind of hallucinating.” We hope they enjoyed their trip!
31

Overserved

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  1. It’s never a good idea to show up tipsy to work. One employee had to call out because they had accidentally chugged a rum and Coke, thinking it was just a regular Coke (personally, we prefer Diet).
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32

K-O

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  1. One employee missed a day of work because they slipped in the shower and knocked themselves unconscious. We don’t talk about shower safety enough!
33

Arachnophobia

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  1. No one likes finding bugs in their house. One employee called in to say they weren’t coming to work because they were having a traumatic stress response to finding a big spider in their apartment and needed a personal day to deal with it.
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34

Laundry Day

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  1. Getting ready for work on time is a challenge we can all relate to. One employee called to say they weren’t coming in because they accidentally set their uniform on fire because they put it in the microwave to dry. A+ for creativity!
    EXPERT TIP
    Jeffrey Fermin

    Jeffrey Fermin

    Employee Relations Expert
    Jeffrey Fermin is an Employee Relations Expert based in Miami, Florida. He currently works as Head of Demand Generation for AllVoices, a platform that manages employee relations issues. Through his work, he has developed extensive experience with understanding human behavior and the intricacies of work life. He’s also the Founder of a full-service marketing company called New Theory. He has more than 13 years of experience in B2B SaaS marketing, and has specifically focused on human resources technology, digital marketing, and content creation. He earned a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and a Bachelor of Education from Florida International University. Jeffrey has won a Microsoft Octas Innovation Award and is a TechCrunch Disrupt Runner-Up.
    Jeffrey Fermin
    Jeffrey Fermin
    Employee Relations Expert

    Be as professional as possible when asking off of work at the last minute. State why you are requesting time off clearly, concisely, and courteously. Explain why you need the time off and apologize for not giving more notice. Provide a plan for how any missed tasks or deadlines will be dealt with in your absence.

35

Let Me Enjoy This

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  1. One employee woke up in a good mood and called off work because, they said, they simply didn’t want work to ruin their day. Maybe honesty isn’t the best policy in every scenario…
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36

In the Dumps

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  1. One employee called in to say he wasn’t coming to work because he had to retrieve all of his personal belongings from the dumpster. The reason? His wife found out he had been cheating and threw away all of his things.
37

The Living Dead

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  1. You never really know everything about your grandparents. One employee had to miss work because their grandmother was being exhumed for a criminal investigation. Which episode of Law and Order was that, again?
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38

Down We Go

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  1. You have to be careful in the bathroom. One employee had to miss work because they accidentally flushed their car keys! (That’s why you always need a spare set.)
39

Alvin Strikes Again

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  1. Chipmunks can be as pesky as they are adorable. One employee called to say they’d be late to work because a horde of chipmunks had filled their truck’s engine with walnuts. They had to spend an hour on a stepstool clearing them all out. (Hopefully the chipmunks found their stash afterward!)
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40

Beware the Nails

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  1. A fancy manicure might be more menacing than you think. One employee got a long, fake set of nails for the first time for a wedding. When they were getting ready for work and washing their face, they accidentally slipped a nail in their nostril and sliced their nose open. Talk about a bloody nose!
41

The Worst Kind of Shortage

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  1. It’s everyone’s worst nightmare—one employee called out of work because they ran out of toilet paper. Legend has it they’re still sitting on the toilet to this day…
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42

Busted

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  1. One employee said they weren’t going to be able to make it into work one day. The reason? They were acting as the getaway driver for their bankrobbing boyfriend, and they were both arrested. (But hey, what you do for fun outside of office hours is non of our business.)
43

Will You Be Mine?

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  1. An employee didn’t show up for work on February 14th and gave no excuse. When he arrived on the 15th, they said they thought Valentine’s Day was a national holiday (and honestly, it should be!).
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44

Heartbreak

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  1. Breakups are hard, and we don’t blame you for needing time to recover. One employee said they weren’t able to come into work because Zayn had left One Direction, and they needed time to grieve.
45

Worst Nightmare

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  1. It happens fast. It happens out of nowhere. And it could happen to any one of us at any time. One employee simply could not make it to work because they sharted on the bus and had to go home to shower. Kudos to them for being honest about it.
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References

  1. https://www.reddit.com/r/work/comments/1dz4vr6/what_are_your_most_creative_or_hilarious_reasons/
  2. https://www.rd.com/list/excuses-for-calling-out-of-work/
  3. https://www.facebook.com/groups/workingmemes/posts/3941274576114091/
  4. https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-excuses/

About This Article

Dan Hickey
Co-authored by:
Dan Hickey
wikiHow Staff Writer
This article was co-authored by wikiHow staff writer, Dan Hickey. Dan Hickey is a Writer and Humorist based in Chicago, Illinois. He has published pieces on a variety of online satire sites and has been a member of the wikiHow team since 2022. A former teaching artist at a community music school, Dan enjoys helping people learn new skills they never thought they could master. He graduated with a BM in Clarinet Performance from DePauw University in 2015 and an MM from DePaul University in 2017.
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Co-authors: 4
Updated: April 4, 2026
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Categories: Work World
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