How to Control Your Urge to Masturbate

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Co-authored by Tasha Rube, LMSW and Dev Murphy, MA

Last Updated: December 4, 2025 Fact Checked

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Avoiding Triggers to Masturbate

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Distracting Yourself

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Controlling Your Sleep Environment

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Video

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Tips

Masturbation is a relatively common activity. It can help to reduce stress, burn calories, and promote relaxation.^{[1]
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Trustworthy Source

Cleveland Clinic
Educational website from one of the world's leading hospitals

Go to source} At the same time, masturbation can also become unhealthy if it starts to interfere with your relationships, work or school life, or home responsibilities. Fortunately, there are some things you can do to control your urge to masturbate so you can focus on more important things in your life.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Avoiding Triggers to Masturbate

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1
Identify your triggers to arousal and avoid them. Triggers to masturbation can be the thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and situations that result in arousal or the urge to masturbate. Triggers vary in each person, but can include attractive people, certain body parts, revealing clothing, inanimate objects, and other things. For some people, triggers can include sounds, smells, or other sensory or thought stimulation. If you work to cope with or reduce these triggers, you may be less likely to act on your impulse to masturbate.^{[2]
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- Make a list (either mental or on paper/the computer) of all of the things that trigger you to engage in masturbation. This list might include things like: looking at pornography, thinking about sex or fantasizing, looking at sex-related items, increased stress or anxiety, or difficulty sleeping.
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Limit your exposure to pornographic material. There are some triggers that you can control yourself, such as looking at objects, pictures, or videos that make you feel aroused. Removing these items can drastically decrease your unintentional arousal, leading to a decrease in your impulse to masturbate.^{[3]
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- Pornographic materials may include: DVDs, magazines, pictures, posters, sculptures, and romance novels.
- Avoid driving by or entering triggering places such as: strip-clubs, brothels, or streets where prostitutes frequently hang out.
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3
Stash sex-objects. Not only will pornographic materials naturally lead to arousal, but any object that reminds you of sexual intercourse or masturbation may lead to arousal and masturbation.^{[4]
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- Remove or hide sex-objects that are triggering for you. These might include: condoms, lubrication (jelly or lotions), vibrators, dildos, sexy outfits, and anything else that you might have that could lead to thoughts of masturbation.
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Limit your internet use.^{[5]
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Research source} Some individuals have a habit of watching pornography on the internet.^{[6]
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Research source} This can make being online in general triggering, as it can lead to difficulty abstaining from masturbation.
- You can put parental controls on your computer or television through your internet/cable service which limits your ability to enter pornographic sites. Discuss this with your internet or cable provider. You don’t have to admit your issue to them because many people with children use these services to restrict their children from going to certain sites or television channels.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Distracting Yourself

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1
Do something else. Try to be as busy as possible during the day and night. Keep your mind focused on activities that do not stimulate your sexual fantasies. This will vary in each person.
- Some examples of positive or distracting activities you can try are: playing video games, watching a movie (non-sexual), going for a walk, going window shopping, playing with a pet, reading a book, playing an instrument, creating art (painting, coloring, sculpting), and writing in a journal.
- Reader Poll: We asked 296 wikiHow readers what form of creative expression best distracts them from unwanted thoughts, and 41% of them said writing, drawing, or painting. [Take Poll]
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Focus on your responsibilities. Our obligations can help us focus on what is necessary (money, food, shelter, education, etc.) rather than what is not essential for daily life (masturbation).^{[7]
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Research source} Having less free time overall can decrease your desire and actual ability to masturbate because it becomes an impractical part of your day. If you don't have time for it, you might not do it.
- Make a list of the things you need to complete each day. This list might include things like: complete work or school projects, go shopping, clean bedroom, pay bills, practice the guitar, and exercise. Keep this list handy. When you have the urge to masturbate, look at your list and tell yourself, “I don’t have time to masturbate right now. I need to get all of this done today.”
- Get a job if you are old enough. A job is a good distraction and can help you structure your schedule. Not to mention you'll have money to spend on activities that can distract and entertain you!
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Change your environment. Sometimes your environment (being home alone, or in your bedroom) can increase your desire to masturbate. Since masturbation in public is most likely inappropriate and illegal, changing your environment may help to reduce your urge to masturbate.
- If you have the urge to masturbate, take a walk outside or go for a drive. If you are in public it may prevent you from masturbating. Additionally, it can take your mind off of your desire to masturbate.
- Ask a friend to hang out or spend time with your family. It will likely limit your ability to masturbate if you are in front of other people.
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Think about the possible negative effects. One way to distract yourself is to remind yourself of or visualize the possible negative effects of excessive masturbation such as: impaired sexual function, depression, dissatisfaction in relationships, high blood pressure, minor injury or irritation, infections, and decreased sexual sensitivity.^{[8]
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Go Ask Alice
Medical advice site with content written by health promotion specialists affiliated with Columbia University

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- Identify the personal negative consequences of your habit of masturbating. This list might include things like difficulty completing work or school tasks, and disruption in personal relationships.^{[9]
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  Go Ask Alice
  Medical advice site with content written by health promotion specialists affiliated with Columbia University
  
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- However, while too much of almost anything can yield negative consequences, it's important to remember that a lot of rumors about what will happen to you if you masturbate (like that it means you're promiscuous or that it'll cause blindness) are just that—rumors.^{[10]
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  HealthyChildren.org
  Health information from the American Academy of Pediatrics.
  
  Go to source}
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Set limits. If you really do not want to masturbate, try to focus on avoiding it when it is inappropriate to do so. For instance, if you and your partner have planned to have intercourse later, you may opt not to masturbate earlier in the day. You'll probably also want to avoid masturbation when you are not totally in private and when you need to be productive doing something else.
- Set goals that are specific to your personal needs. Some individuals may want to avoid masturbation altogether for religious or cultural reasons, while others may want to limit masturbation so they can dedicate that time to other things.
- It is easy to lose your sense of time while masturbating. Be sure of how much time you have until your next obligation, such as work, school, etc. If you do not have enough time until your next obligation, consider putting off masturbation until later.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Controlling Your Sleep Environment

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1
Lie down in bed only for sleep. Since your bedroom and bed are likely the most frequented areas for masturbation, it is important to control this environment – especially in regards to sleep and what you choose to do in your bedroom.
- Do not spend time in bed doing activities such as reading, watching TV, or using the computer.
- Stay in a standing or sitting position the remainder of the time (during the day).
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Keep your bladder as empty as possible. The urge to urinate can be mistaken by the body as the urge for sex/masturbation, especially in AFAB people, because the clitoris, vaginal opening, and urethral opening are so close together, and when one is stimulated, the other may become stimulated too.^{[11]
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Go Ask Alice
Medical advice site with content written by health promotion specialists affiliated with Columbia University

Go to source} Regardless of your gender, go to the bathroom before you go to sleep at night and immediately when you wake up in the morning. Even if you feel the slightest urge to urinate, relieve yourself as soon as possible.
- Be careful forcing yourself to urinate, as you may end up "training" your bladder to want to empty when it's not very full, leading to an overactive bladder—and the urge to urinate even more often.^{[12]
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Go to sleep when you are really tired. This way, you will fall asleep quickly after lying down in bed and not spend time in bed trying to fall asleep. Drink a glass of warm milk before bed if necessary to help induce relaxation, which may make it easier to fall asleep.^{[13]
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- Some people who have trouble sleeping at night may use masturbation as means for relaxation.^{[14]
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  PubMed Central
  Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health
  
  Go to source} If this applies to you, try deep-breathing instead. Simply breathe deeply and slowly in through your nose and out through your mouth until you fall asleep.^{[15]
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If you're used to masturbating first thing in the morning, make a habit of getting out of bed as soon as you wake up in the morning. Avoid lying in bed awake if you think it'll increase your desire to masturbate.

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Tips

Do not feel afraid to talk to a counselor, family member, or very close friend who you trust about your masturbation issue.^{[16]
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Keep in mind that though these tips can help you at times, they may not be able to fully prevent you from masturbating. If this is the case, consider cutting back on masturbating rather than attempting to stop completely.

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